


This little book is so powerful I keep it at my bedside table, reaching over and over for a serving of Sugar. Packed into this little volume are not just her responses to readers’ letters, but a potent light shone on our greatest human potential in relationship to each other, as she shows how there are opportunities to heal the greatest of injuries in and through our complex entanglements with others. Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice on Love and Life from Dear Sugar by Cheryl Strayed As such, I give this book my stamp of approval. And he does so in a way that I think will resonate with a lot of people in a way that we - ugh, it’s hard to admit - researchers and professor-types sometimes don’t. And after being on the front lines of those marriage disasters, he’s able to capture exactly what the relationship researchers are suggesting, with his sharp writing, hard-hitting advice and heart-warming clarity. He’s seen the worst of the worst (the unthinkable worst and then some) of over a thousand couples. You might wonder why I, a relationship researcher, am promoting the advice of a divorce lawyer? Here’s what I like and why I highly recommend this book: Sexton reverse-engineers marriage success. If You’re in My Office, It’s Already Too Late: A Divorce Lawyer’s Guide to Staying Togetherby James Sexton
HAPPY NEGATIVE MARRIAGE RAW HOW TO
You won’t find more credible advice about how to shift, often just slightly, your tone of voice, word choices or even facial expressions to make your marriage those among the masters (and not the disasters). Then buy a case of these books and gift to everyone you know - keeping one for yourself and one for your spouse/future spouse/significant other and maybe a spare in your bag for those “my head is about to explode because they forgot to _again” moments. See the above comments about Gottman and his landmark work, and copy/paste here. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert by John Gottman Never loan your copy to someone you won’t get it back. In this book, he’s applied those observations - in practical, smart, easy-to-apply lessons - to help all of your relationships.

( Editor’s note: Watch his TEDxVeniceBeach Talk here.) His longitudinal research on marriage is the gold standard he and his team can predict divorce with over 90 percent accuracy based on just a few key communication behaviors. The Relationship Cure: A 5 Step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage, Family, and Friendships by John Gottman and Joan DeClaireĪny book by the relationship guru John Gottman is a book you’ll want to read. Some have been my favorites a while others are newer because they’re newer in publication date or they finally came across my radar (usually thanks to a geeky friend/therapist/fellow relationship researcher). To help inform you, I’ve picked my favorite books and podcasts for making and keeping better relationships. You increase your chances of success by knowing more about your choices and how they contribute (or don’t) to a healthy partnership. One thing that we researchers know for sure: Relationships are a little bit art and a little bit science. Plus, I don’t think relationships are about luck they’re work.Īs a social scientist who studies marriage, family and friendship, I’m of the mind that we should arm ourselves with knowledge about how to make our relationships - all of them, no matter if they’re of the chosen or biological variety - awesome. OK, I didn’t actually write “good luck.” It’s too snarky. In my defense, with it I also included a gift card or cash and a note suggesting they use the money to head to their favorite café, bar or restaurant for a date night where they could discuss divorce - just so they don’t end up as one. I mean: If you’re going to be in a successful, til-death-do-us type of relationship, you should want to know the science of divorce, amiright? It may or may not be true that one of my go-to gifts to newlyweds used to be the book What Predicts Divorce.

Marriage and family researcher Carol Bruess shares a list of her favorite relationship books and podcasts. Sarah Jane Souther / TED Relationships take work, but there’s good news: Researchers, writers and podcasters have already done some of the heavy lifting in exploring how we can connect with the people in our lives.
